Ask Zaukodar
Writing Question

I entirely blame watching “Wolf Children” for the context of this post, but a thought came to me that I need a few pointers on. Specifically: is there a crash course for visual novel/comic book writing somewhere? Screenplay would be even better, but that one seems easier to find stuff on.

The Wind Rises

As depressing as “The Maze Runner” was and made me feel crummy about entertainment, “The Wind Rises” made everything go 180 and set everything in the world right again.  Film is a form of art, and what matters with art is how it makes you feel.  “The Wind Rises” makes me feel glad for the things in the world, because even if those things are used by evil men for evil purposes the world is still a better place to have had them in it.

Hayao Miyazaki, thank you.  You made my world a brighter place.

So…The Maze Runner.

I do not pretend to know the content of the books and have only seen the movie a few hours ago.  Maybe I don’t understand the latest craze of teens-and-young-adults-being-killed-off stories, but this was a surprisingly grim and depressing film on the sole point that it was teenage kids being killed off willy nilly.  I don’t get it.  If anyone who follows is on the fence about going to see this, Redbox is your friend.

jamesbong00420:

scenicroutes:

naruhodos:

is this the rise of the brave tangled frozen dragons

no actually it’s even better than that
this is a still from a 1990 television special entitled, “cartoon all-stars to the rescue,” which, literally, was absolutely nothing but half an hour of beloved children’s cartoon characters attempting to get that kid in the blue to stop smoking pot.
it opens with a brief clip of george h.w. bush and barbara bush sitting in the oval office, petting their dog. the president of the united states looks into the camera and says, “some of your favourite cartoon characters will help you understand how drugs and alcohol can ruin your life.”
and that brief clip alone would be worth the price of admission but then we get into the actual story, which begins with a teenage boy smashing his kid sister’s piggy bank to buy pot. while alvin and the chipmunks look on in abject terror. and winnie the pooh exclaims, “oh my!” and then the kid runs off to buy pot in an alley and bugs bunny appears out of nowhere dressed as a cop, picks a joint off the pavement, and launches into an anti-drug spiel.
it’s actually really not the kind of thing that can be put into words so here’s the full half-hour video, knock yourself out

oh my GOD


I remember watching this when I was in school.  Someone do this again for our current generation and I will throw money at it.

jamesbong00420:

scenicroutes:

naruhodos:

is this the rise of the brave tangled frozen dragons

no actually it’s even better than that

this is a still from a 1990 television special entitled, “cartoon all-stars to the rescue,” which, literally, was absolutely nothing but half an hour of beloved children’s cartoon characters attempting to get that kid in the blue to stop smoking pot.

it opens with a brief clip of george h.w. bush and barbara bush sitting in the oval office, petting their dog. the president of the united states looks into the camera and says, “some of your favourite cartoon characters will help you understand how drugs and alcohol can ruin your life.”

and that brief clip alone would be worth the price of admission but then we get into the actual story, which begins with a teenage boy smashing his kid sister’s piggy bank to buy pot. while alvin and the chipmunks look on in abject terror. and winnie the pooh exclaims, “oh my!” and then the kid runs off to buy pot in an alley and bugs bunny appears out of nowhere dressed as a cop, picks a joint off the pavement, and launches into an anti-drug spiel.

it’s actually really not the kind of thing that can be put into words so here’s the full half-hour video, knock yourself out

oh my GOD

I remember watching this when I was in school. Someone do this again for our current generation and I will throw money at it.

pixelreblags:

restaurant ramen is god +_+

…son of a bitch

toshbizzyo:

malapropsbookstore:

infinitywhale:

gunpowderchant:

Get your facts straight, CNN.

If you didn’t know, Stephen Colbert is a literal expert on Lord of the Rings. He went onto the sets of one of the films and managed to beat the resident lore expert in a trivia contest. Someday he will die and Death will come, and he will live forever by challenging him to a contest of LoTR trivia.

Headcanon accepted.

I’ve been looking everywhere for this oh my god

If I am to remember correctly, the only person on earth who can beat Colbert at Tolkien-lore is Christopher Lee.  That is still high praise.

Dear small cat sitting atop my head,
Anonymous

Dear small cat,

I miss you.  I miss having you wait for me when I get home, I miss having you hop up onto my lap so you could cuddle, I miss having you curled up on me while I sleep, and I miss having you be diligent about getting my ass up at 7am sharp.  I miss having you around and giving me something to look forward to after a day of work.

You never did sit atop my head, but you were my shoulder kitty and that’s enough for me.  I would have given anything to isolate the cause of your sickness so I could fix it and keep you.  But that didn’t work out, so I gave you to my friends who have given you a better home than mine.

You are the sweetest, cuddliest, purriest little kitten I have ever known.  Even if I don’t have you in my home I still love you and miss you.  Maybe I’ll see you again someday, but if not then thank you for making my home a cuter place for those two months.

Your first owner,

Zaukodar

Dear Santa...
Anonymous

Dear Santa,

It may have come to your attention that I have not written you in a very, very long time.  It used to be that when I wanted to demonstrate just how good I was I would write a letter to you and list off all the good, little things I had done so far in the year and then let you know what things I would be ecstatic to receive for Christmas.

Then came the years when I grew up and put such things away, in part because the pretense of your existence with my parents had passed away and I was in the mind I would never need to write to you again.  How silly it was of me to assume that I would never write you again!  Because one day came along and I took up a challenge and some Anonymous person wanted me to write a letter to you.

Well, I could tell you all the good, little things I did this year.  But the truth is that I am likely on your “Naughty” list and will deservedly be receiving coal for a year of struggling I did not endure as well as I should.  In truth, the thing I want most is something you are powerless to give and would refuse to give either way on account of its prohibitive cost.

Instead, I’m going to do what I should have done years ago.  Thank you.  Thank you for making my Christmases full of jovial anticipation, thank you for being a part of my traditions of youth, and thank you for putting up with all the inane things I surely bothered you with.  But most of all, thank you for being generous in spite of it all.

All I can and will ask for is that you keep making children across the world happy, or at the very least happy with anticipation.  Youth is fleeting, after all!  And if there is some part I may yet play in all of that, I will do it with whatever life I have left in me.

With Deep Gratitude,

Zaukodar

Send me one “Dear—-” and I’ll write a letter to this person

Dear person I hate,

Dear person I like,

Dear ex boyfriend,

Dear ex girlfriend,

Dear ex bestfriend,

Dear bestfriend,

Dear *anyone*,

Dear Santa,

Dear mom,

Dear dad,

Dear future me,

Dear past me,

Dear person I’m jealous of,

Dear person I had a crush on,

Dear girlfriend,

Dear boyfriend,

I will accept this challenge.

Not something I’m often prone to do these days, though another friend of mine is in need of a signal boost.  If anyone likes chainmaille jewelry, I would strongly recommend you click on this link.  Her skill and adaptability for customization are noteworthy, and it’s light on the wallet as well!